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| Teal is about my favorite color! |
As many of you may know, my mother-in-law, Ida, has moved in with us. She has Dementia brought on by AD (Alzheimer's Disease) with a side order of Sundowners Syndrome! Sundowners affects approx 20% of those with AD and basically everything implodes at dusk. That is the easiest way to say it! lol I am so happy to be at work today and even my severely sleep deprived eyes have a touch of sparkle in them just by being here today. This is good since the circles under my eyes have turned into cul-de-sacs! :)
It is not an easy transition to say the very least. My son with Asbergers pretty much won't come out of his room. I can't blame him. I don't want to come out of mine either. My daughter was so cute and said "Fix it Momma, you can fix anything!". *sigh* (where did that magic wand go?)
Humor is my resort. So, here are the interesting things I have learned from Ida since she moved in:
1. We are supposed to go outside to milk cows. We obviously don't have cows because our sorry dog doesn't know how to herd them in to be milked.
Actually: We live in a neighborhood. Owning cows is against the covenants of the neighborhood and our dog is a standard poodle who has never seen a cow which would explain his inability to herd them.
2. I seem like a nice girl. Grant should make an honest woman out of me and marry me.
Actually: Grant and I have been married 16 years and have four children. I also have two step sons.
Ida: Where did you find them (the stepsons) at?
Lise: They were here when I got here.
Ida: They came with the house?
Lise: No, they came with your son.
Ida: Where did he get them?
Lise:.......uhm....his ex-wife.
Ida: Where did she come from?
Lise......uhmm....could I phone a friend?
3. Ida says she doesn't like sweets.
Actually: You do. I bought 2 dozen doughnuts from Krispy Kreme. Morning comes with 1 dozen of them gone. Spouse blames kids. I explain that there's no way the children did it because they don't like the plain ones. They go for the chocolate covered and such. But there it was....one empty box of plain doughnuts. We check Ida's room and find a mountain of wadded up napkins with doughnut crumbs all over them. Sure enough, Ida ate 1 dozen Krispy Kreme doughnuts during her wanderings through the night.
Note to self: Buy childproof locks for cabinets.....and pantry, and.....
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| Keep smiling!! |
Today's post has been brought to you by the letter K.
The outfit? Brought to you by some really good shopping fun with Joy at the outlets!
Jewelry: J. Crew (50% 0ff)
Gloves: Coach (in first picture)
Shirt: Banana Republic ($9)
Vest: Ann Taylor (thrifted)
Pants: Banana Republic ($14.99)-and long!
Purse: Coach
Flower: Leah Hollet (gifted)
Smile: Mine
Thanks again for all the wonderful holiday wishes and all the new followers! We love meeting each of you and learning your stories also.
Look, if you phone me, I'm not going to know the answers either! LOL
ReplyDeleteYou look great and if you look great, you'll feel great, right? RIGHT?
Remember what H. Randolph Holder used to say on WNGC? Keep smiling until 10 o'clock and the rest of the day will take care of itself!!
Oh lady you crack me up!! Here's another little item, besides rehabing my MIL from the stroke, my FIL had dementia and sundowners! I'm happy you can keep your sense of humor! That will help! Is Grant older than you? My husband is almost 11 years my senior so that meant we dealt with aging parents while we still had little kids, much younger than you typically think of people going through it. A whole dozen???? Wow! You look beautiful today. I agree with you , going to work at my part-time job was helpful, gave a little break. You and Joy's blog is just what I was looking for- real people I can relate to!! God bless.
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ReplyDeleteLet me try again. Joy: You ARE my phone a friend. Thats all there is to it.
ReplyDeletePeggy: Ida is 84 and I did marry an man who is a bit older which seemed so romantic at the time. ;) And I am so glad you found us also!!!
I remember when Pawpaw, Chris's grandfather, had AD. He had helped raise him and it was hard to lose him a piece at a time. However, there was always humor to be found as well. AD gave Pawpaw a second life he never would have had. In this second life he was the mayor of Oakwood and owned several of the local businesses. He was a multimillionaire, planning a trip around the world. He had two other wives besides Memaw, one was pregnant with twin boys and one with twin girls. (And him not even a good Mormon, but a Church of God - Holiness, instead!!!) And we learned things we never would have known, like how he had run moonshine when he was younger to support his parents and siblings. I thought Memaw was gonna DIE when he told us about that one! :-D Best of all, he got to relive Chris's childhood through Harley. Harley visited with him at least once a week, sometimes more. Pawpaw always just called him "The Boy" and smiled at him and watched him play. Chris spent his childhood with Pawpaw. Chris's mother had no time for a son crippled by a heart condition, but Pawpaw always loved teaching him and having him around. Being with Harley gave him a piece of that again.
ReplyDeleteThe only way to deal with this is humor and you seem to have that covered! My Grandparents lived with my parents until fairly recently and my Grandma has Alzheimers - my favorite line was when I was 7 months pregnant she told me I was getting "pretty tubby". She then asked who the h*ll I was. :) Hey - if you don't laugh you'll cry.
ReplyDeleteYour outfit is fab by the way - you and Joy did quite well at the outlets!!
My grandmother lived with us for a year while she had AD. I was away in college for much of it, but there were some funny stories... she would have laughed at herself if she were well. She went to adult day care at a local nursing home for a while and her memory did get a bit better during that time.
ReplyDeleteAfter she had to go into a nursing home (our rural neighborhood was too dangerous if she were to wander) she became the "President" of the nursing home. Just one letter from "resident" to "President"!!
Joy - On another note, I went back through old posts today, and I am SO IMPRESSED that you met Colin Ferguson. I discovered "Eureka" this year and have seen all the old episodes on Netflix multiple times!!!
Actually this is Debbie and I have to totally agree--humor works great! We had my mom living with us and she had hallucinations on top of everyting else. We finally all ended up having conversations with her imaginary "visitors" including a tribal queen from Africa that visited regularly. Just keep smiling!!
ReplyDeleteOMG! Y'all, you have to keep the stories coming. I can promise you that this kind of stuff is what is keeping Lise going. She'll have to tell you about Ida planning their escape last night using Lise's husband as a lookout! LOL
ReplyDeleteJoyce, I met Colin and the girl that plays Jo and the guy that plays Fargo. They are all so super nice. If you go back to September, there's a post about DragonCon and you can go here and see my DragonCon pics:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/53065137@N07/sets/72157624780301409/
I'm just a bit of a scifi geek!
I am so honored that my humble flower is adorning a COACH! I need to steal some pictures of the flowers for my blog... http://bizzy-beth.blogspot.com/
ReplyDeleteYou've got your hands full. :) I love that you are living life with a sense of humor. It sure helps.
ReplyDeleteYour outfit is amazing!
Lise Marie...I hope this doesn't post twice..I have had a little trouble with it..but it was important to me to tell you #1 YOU LOOK FABULOUS! Love everything about this outfit and
ReplyDelete#2 KEEP YOUR SENSE OF HUMOR STRONG! I think it is my sense of humor and blogging that have helped get me through living with my mother without explosions. The sad part for me is that no one wants to be at home...but if I can keep the kids laughing when Grandmas says that the milk I buy doesn't come from a cow then I am less likely to react with impatience. My husband's mom had dementia and thought he was trying to date her. She was concerned I would kick her out of the house in a jealous rage. She also thought she was pregnant..another story for another day! Keep laughing!
BTW...I hope you ladies will enter the contest on my site...I am giving away a beautiful necklace!!
I LOVE EVERYONE HERE! Oh My! I can't thank you all enough for sharing and keeping me laughing and sane today! It is also great to know that I am not alone and what I am going through many of you have or are going through now. WOW! Please feel free to write any suggestions or survival tactics to me (lmtyner@yahoo.com).
ReplyDeleteLise Marie- you are fabulous!! its so hard when someone you love has AD. My grandmother moved in with my mom when she could stay alone anymore. She had sundowners also, and as soon as it would hit about 4 pm- everything went haywire. The funniest thing I remember was when my son was about 2, she used to think he was Clyde, a little black boy that lived down the street from her when she was a teenager. She used to fuss on him, saying, Clyde you better get home before your momma comes and gives you a whippin! You just have to laugh to get through it. If not, you'll go crazy. My hats off to you for taking on such a big challenge!!
ReplyDeleteLM - It doesn't seem like it now, but your life WILL get to be normal again. It will be a new normal, not like it was, but hey... that's life. It changes. Think of the example of selflessness you are giving your children. And what a wonderful thing for your MIL to be surrounded by family for as long as possible in this stage of her life.
ReplyDeletePart of my experience with my grandmother was that those who hadn't dealt with her disease didn't understand how we could laugh about it, but maybe that's because I was 21. Do what you have to do for your sanity and don't worry about what anyone thinks who isn't living in your house.
Joy - thanks for the link to the pics - I LOVE Fargo! And Jo is so much prettier in the pic.
Joyce, I said the same thing when I saw her! She is so very pretty in person!
ReplyDeleteDo you watch Warehouse 13? I met those guys, too, but I didn't want to pay for pics with them! LOL They were pretty cool, too.
Oh my goodness you are a trooper handling everything!
ReplyDeleteThe Coach bag is divine. I love the neutral color.
Joy -
ReplyDeleteI have watched it, but I haven't gotten as into it as Eureka, probably because there are no earlier seasons available to watch instantly on Netflix. I loved (loved, loved) the crossover shows they did earlier this year.
You have to pay for pics? Seriously? How much? How are they going to stop you from taking one? I feel so naive. Wow.
The costume pics from Dragon Con were a hoot. People are so creative!
After reading the posts concerning families who deal with parents with Alzheimer's, I am in awe of how well you all (y'all) handle your different situations. The key thread I see is humor. My parents died relatively young (63 & 67) so my brothers and I did not experience any of the health issues that befall the elderly. MIL, on the other hand, keeps driving even tho she can't see squat. Bravo to all you caregivers out there! BTW, love this blog and look forward to every post! Lise Marie and Joy, you rock!
ReplyDeleteYou llok faboo!!!!
ReplyDeleteI am adding you gals to a best of 2010 post tommorrow if that's ok.
xXx
Reva
if not let me know- i will also provide a link....
I am so glad that you can use humor in your situatuion. right out of nursing school I worked in a home for older adults on the evening shift. I know all about sun-downers.
ReplyDeleteMy brother has a son with Asbergers as well.
You have a lot on your plate and I salute you!
Brett, got any advise on how to handle the sundowners?
ReplyDeleteReva, you are more than welcome to talk about us!!
Joyce, in the Hall of Fame, where the stars sit to give autographs, you have to pay anywhere from to $10-$50 for a pic and autograph, depending on who it is. And they have security that walk around in there making sure you don't take pics. Now if you see a star walking around somewhere else or you go to see them speak at a panel, you can take all the pics you want!
Lisa Marie--you look gorgeous in the teal! I think I will do a copycat of this look soon.
ReplyDeleteI cannot imagine the challenges you are dealing with, but I laughed out loud at the doughnut story. A sense of humor helps, but I'm going to add you to my prayer list too.
Oh my, I would say you have your hands full. I'm sorry and I hope things get a little easier as your MIL gets comfortable. I do have to say that I love your professional outfit today. The teal with the vest... perfect!
ReplyDeleteHuh. Well, I guess their faces are property...
ReplyDeleteI actually have Eureka's theme song as a ringtone, but it's not assigned to anyone right now.
Okay, first off, I have to be absolutely completely honest, no matter how bad it makes me look. Here goes, when I read the donut story; the first thought that popped into my head was, "How cool to be be so old that you can eat a dozen donuts in one sitting and it doesn't bother you a bit!".....made me get a bit excited about being an old lady!
ReplyDeleteSecondly, you look so chic and elgant. The absolute picture of a Southern Lady. I nominate you to be our ambassador! ~Serene
This made me crack up:) I love your humor and your compassion! It makes you a truly beautiful lady!
ReplyDeleteOh boy you have your hands full...but you look adorable, sometimes looking great can boost your spirits!! Looove the ex wife dilema...heeheeee. My grandmother lived with my parents after a stroke, she was very concerned with the horses in the yard making a mess, but the worst part is that she was a very modest lady and began "flashing" everyone that came over to visit. My 2 yr. old son at the time kept saying...granma peek a boo? peek a boo? Hang in there!! It only hurts when you can't laugh anymore!!
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